iNadeQuate

A Tribute to my Mother!

2009-05-10T05:01:00.000-07:00

Today being Mother's Day I thought I will write few words about my Mom.

Just like everyone's Mom, my mother is also a special woman. A God fearing woman I can say. I and my Mom share a relationship that is more like a friend than a parent. I mean that never stopped all the spankings and corrections though! But I hardly would think twice to share anything with my mother. She is like the shock-absorber of my family. She can contain a ton of worries and still be very calm and composed. Though me, my bro and my dad get to her nerves, at the end of the day she still makes our favorite dishes! Her patience is like a perennial river which never runs dry. I can easily write a book on how her life has had a major influence on mine. I am truly thankful to have a Mom like her!

Finally I would like to wish my Mom and all the mothers a very Happy Mother's Day!

INADEQUATE IS INADEQUATE

2009-05-08T23:38:00.000-07:00

Eventually I end up with the inevitable. Inadequate is inadequate of words to speak, of moods to convert, of emotions to express and of the mind to comprehend. As the clock ticks by every second, the entropy of life seems to be all the more increasing. The randomness has been a conspicuous attribute of my daily routine. Someone once said, “Every morning I wake up I realize I am one more day closer to my grave.” Though it is an unpleasant statement to make, it certainly has an element of truth in it. There is a portion of solace that I derive from that thought. It helps me live my life with utmost meaning and abundance. Surely God would want the same from me.

My profuse introspection makes me realize that I am inadequate of things that could make me better. It’s like thinking how can a bird in the cage which wants to fly be different from a free bird that does not want to fly. Is it true that at some point in our lives we virtually build cages around ourselves and fail to exercise our wings? The void in my mind has been uncontrollably overflowing and all I can do is sense it. And sense it in excess always. The only thing that comes to my mind is everything is worthless. I mean look around I see the meaningless elections (no matter who comes into power it’s a truth that nothing is going to change!), the rat race for power, the spit spat of the rulers, the lack of money, the deprivation of life, the excess flow of money in IPL (a million dollars for KP who could hardly score), the cheerless cheer girls, the unending fight against terror, the suffering of the people and the peace of the dead. All this is reality but then does anything make sense? At least not for me! When I am gone I think the only thing that matters is the difference I could make in people’s lives. Between, I always had this doubt – Do people add meaning to our lives or does life add meaning to people?

I reckon each one of us come to a point where we are left with some unsolved puzzles. What if all my rest gives restlessness? What if all my efforts keep going a “waste”? The exquisite concern of oneself can only make one overwhelmingly confused. No matter how far you go, how high you fly, how deep you swim you cannot escape from your conscience, your irresistible thoughts and above all God. Looks like I am inadequate of space to contain my thoughts! If my words cannot make sense then how on earth can my silence be heard? Anyways the perplexing fact is I am inadequate of words to describe my very own silence. You can obviously see the inadequacy of order in my writing today!

Howbeit I resolved to break out of this cocoon phase of silence or inadequacy or “orderlessness”. The added surprises (in a depressing way!) are passing clouds with lasting effects. Well you guys have to figure out what that line means for yourselves.

Inadequate of more to pen, I’m signing off….

p.s: The title was not coined by me, but you can be sure that the words of inadequacy are mine ;-) !

Simply Smitten!

2009-02-20T10:36:00.000-08:00

This post is dedicated to all my friends who made my birthday very special and made me feel special :)

Well it is true that sometimes what others do unto you actually helps you learn more about yourself. One of my friends was saying that God has blessed me with very good friends. Yes I know God always gives me the best was my reply! :) This birthday, I thought, would just pass by silently unnoticed. I really was not in the mood of the day since I was on the spree of sleepless nights. With heavily loaded eyes and fidgetiness, all I wanted was some rest and peace. I knew I wanted to be alone. However that proved to be absolutely wrong when I was swept away with all the surprises and lovely gifts I received from my buddies. I was simply smitten by the love of all my friends. I was humbled by their affection. All my spirits went straight up and I had an amazing time with all of them. Their simple thoughts and plans for my day is something very precious and invaluable.

One good thing about birthdays is you get to speak to all of your friends whom you have been away from for ages. Though we are very close we are very far! Reminiscing all those sweet memories can only strengthen your faith that there still exists love in the air. The beauty of life, family and friends kept overwhelmingly unfolding to me as the day passed by. Though this birthday was different in many ways from those in my past, I can very easily say it is one of my most memorable birthdays.

I want to thank all of my friends for their wishes and above all God for blessing me with such wonderful people.

p.s. I know this post seems to be kinda sentimental...could not help it folks, words just came after a real long break :)

Satyam- A Shocker!!

2009-01-08T21:42:00.001-08:00

The other day as I entered my home , my Mom was on her feet staring at the television set. I reckoned it was the "Grand Finale" of some music show. I was wrong! She said Ramalinga Raju, Founder and Chairman of Satyam resigned admitting fraud and the next moment I was also starring at the television set. I had no comments to make but was absolutely shocked at the horrifying magnitude of the fraud that was involved. Can this actually happen? Is this some kind of a practical joke? Or may be the whole world was being Punk'd and probably we'll get to see Ashton Kutcher!! (sorry that was a little over the line...! )

By writing the letter and very plainly mentioning that it was all his fault and that none is to be blamed for, what was Raju trying to display? All I can see is another big lie. Such horrendous stuff cannot be single handed and he cannot be blinding the eyes of the public and more importantly the investors, the employees and all those who trusted in him and the company. Nevertheless there is a human side of him that he atleast admitted the whole fraud and took up responsibility for his act. But does that help? Such corporate crimes are like eye openers to the governance bodies and need to remind them that they have to prudently circumspect all the other companies who are sailing on the same boat yet have managed to be under the cover so far. I mean atleast there is a chance that one of these many big shots in the corporate world are playing it safe and pulling it off just like Raju managed for nearly 10 years. I heard on TV it was 10 years and I quote from his letter "The gap in the balance sheet has arisen purely on account of inflated profits over several years (limited only to Satyam standalone, books of subsidiaries reflecting true performance). What started as a marginal gap between actual operating profit and the one reflected in the books of accounts continued to grow over the years."

Whatever might be the laws of the land to punish Raju, whatever be the assurances given by the Interim CEO, whatever steps are taken to bridge the gap, I am more than certain that the damage is irreparable. Things are never going to be the same for Satyam. Many corporates, banks and agencies all over the world have rebuked this shameful act. Finally there are few questions that remain flummoxing to me:

Why did he want to own Maytas when he knew he was already in a mess? Was it personal or motivated by the interest of the company?
Was not 10 years if I am correct, too long a time for a person of his stature to realize that he was playing around with nearly 53,000 lives?
He mentions that he was making efforts to fill the gap. What were those efforts? Is it not that making a lie of Rs7000 crores causes every effort to be meaningless?
Satyam has been kicked out of the World bank and other indexes so what damage control steps as mentioned by the Interim CEO, Ram will bring them to their past glory?
Will the company actual emerge stronger from this crisis and reinforce the faith of those broken?
Last but not the least if Raju was courageous enough to write a letter and take the blame why is he sneaking into hotels or not answering calls? Why can't he make himself public?

All we can do is WaW!! (Wait and Watch!)

Slumdog Millionaire

2009-01-04T02:40:00.000-08:00

When I first heard the name of the movie I anticipated that it would have some interesting scenes to watch out for. After I watched it I must say it was one heck of a movie! It blew me off! Directed fantastically by Danny Boyle, written and screen played incredibly by Simon Beaufoy, Slumdog Millionaire is about the journey of a boy, Jamal from the gutters to the stars. It is based on the book Q and A written by Vikas Swaroop. Jamal played by the new comer Dev Patel looked more like a professional than a new comer. He did a tremendous job and most deservedly won the critical acclaim and numerous awards as well.

There is drama, romance and suspense in the movie that keeps you glued to the screen until the end. Salim, the brother of Jamal was astounding in his acrimonious character with the right attitude he was supposed to hold on to until the end. All the roles played by "the three musketeers" at three different stages of their lives were simply marvelous. The film depicts the bare naked Mumbai with all its exceedingly gross slums, gangsters rein, hindu muslim extremism, betrayals, murder and money chase. However it eventually unfolds the fabulous and gorgeous love story of Jamal and Latika. The musical montage offered by A.R Rehman was just a delicious touch to the entire movie which moves on from rags to riches.

If you have watched the movie I am sure you would agree with me and if you have not watched it yet I strongly suggest you watch it right away! Three cheers to the "the three musketeers(Danny Boyle, Simon Beaufoy and Dev Patel)"!!! :)

Good bye 2008!

2008-12-31T01:39:00.000-08:00

Dear 2008,

It has been wonderful knowing you and being with you all through the year. The fact that I will never see you again is something that pinches me but is abated by the exuberance of the arrival of a new year 2009. You sustained me through joys and sorrows. You have given me pains and pleasures.

I an indebted to you for all the lovely people you introduced to me and I am glad for the difference they could make in my life. I am overwhelmed by the fun you gave me every moment. You taught me that life is like a treasure and the more you explore the more you are humbled by its vastness and intricacy. The lessons you have taught me and the love you have shown me will continue to remind me about the faithfulness of God of wonders beyond our galaxy!!

I hope 2009 will also have in store for me much more fun, adventure, challenges and excitement. No matter who comes and goes no one can replace you. I will not make promises or demonstrate devotion saying "I will not forget you!". All I can say is a simple "Thank you!I really enjoyed your company."

Good Bye 2008!
Stella.

White Ribbon Day

2008-12-27T04:45:00.001-08:00

The following video was made by us (the Arts Team) for our Christmas Programme. It was a tragic coincidence that during the time we were working on the video did the Mumbai terror attacks take place. For those who missed the video that day, you can check it out here.

How can it be that God is love?
When blood rolls down upon our land
And fathers lose their only son
Where is the hope?
Oh God we pray for white ribbon day

How can it be that you could love?
When blood ran down that wooden cross
Your father gave his only son
You came for peace
You came to die for white ribbon day

And we pray for peace
To flood our hearts again
Only god can save our nation now
And we long for joy to fill our streets again
Only god can save our nation now

How can it be that God is just?
When flesh is torn from young and old
And children run in bloody fields
Where is the hope?
Oh God we pray for white ribbon day

And we pray for peace
To flood our hearts again
Only God can save our nation now
And we long for joy to fill our streets again
Only God can save our nation now

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah for white ribbon day

And can it be that You are just
When flesh was torn for young and old?
And here we stand saved by Your blood
We'll stand with courage
We'll live and die for white ribbon day

Hallelujah, hallelujah,
Hallelujah for white ribbon day

What. A. Victory.

2008-12-15T03:15:00.000-08:00

There cannot be a better way to get back Cricket into going after the recent Mumbai terror attacks in India. I applaud the England team for returning to India after the atrocious things that struck India. I applaud the IPS of Chennai and his team for all the security and the efforts they put in to make the game possible. I applaud the crowd of Chennai who never backed down no matter what to see their heroes play (5000 on the first day to 30000 on the final day). I applaud the Indian team(specially Sehwag,Yuvraj and Gambhir) for their brilliant performance after coming back from a bitter recent past. Last but not the least I applaud Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar for that extra ordinary stupendous century that lead India to the win!

What more could one ask for in a test cricket! In a time where the 20-20s and one day forms have been over shadowing Test cricket, this match stands out as an answer to all those in question. No doubt that this has been a pleasure and treat to watch for every cricket lover. Most certainly it was a record breaking performance from India because chasing a huge score like 387( fourth highest) is no joke! Champion knocks from Sehwag who marked the perfect start for India and backed by composed and conitnuous tempo maintaining games from Gambhir, Laxman, Sachin and Yuvi and the bowlers who could previously restrict the English players were all part of this very special and amazing victory. England played well by dominating 70 percent of the match but India played even better and snatched the match away from the visitors. Surely a very very bitter pill for KP and his men to swallow!

But it is a privilege to witness such a victory which could easily be among those unforgettable wins right on the top! Way to go India!! After beating Australia 2-0 in the test series and England 5-0 in the one day series and now going up 1-0, I only wish that this momentum keeps going and we go on to make a World Cup winning team!! Bravo India!!!

A real break..

2008-12-03T20:47:00.000-08:00

This post was actually meant to be on terrorism but later I thought I would post something pleasant and ecstatic. Yesterday I happened to witness the live concert by Jethro Tull and Anoushka Shankar. To be honest I was not an ardent fan of any but I just thought I will go and check out. I never had any expectation or any clue what so ever about what was coming. Infact I thought the audi would be noisy when Tull plays the contemporary or the progressive rock.

So after a long wait in the queue I enter the Shilpakalavedika (for the first time!) and the first impression was not so overwhelming though. The best part was I ran into my ex-manager at the entrance and it was such a heart warming surprise. Finally the show starts after a delay as per the Indian Stretchable Time (IST) and of course it was expected. Anderson, the lead vocalist of Jethro Tull came onto the stage and introduced Anoushka and her team. She was looking small, with a cute smile though! They started the show with a south Indian raaga mixed with her own composition which she called as "Voice of the moon" It was idyllic and pleasurable to the ears. The tabla and flute made it even more enjoyable. She continued with another number of her own composition.

Next it was Jethro Tull and they just rocked the show! I reckon the average age of the band must be around 50 yet the energy and the exuberance they were displaying was awesome. Especially Anderson, by whose flute and vocals the band is characterized has been simply brilliant. He was all over the stage, standing on a single leg most of the time and doing acrobatics. Hats off to his enthused performance! Needless to say the variety they had (guitars, drums, mandolin, flute, harmonica and some other instruments names of which I do not know!) the perfect timing and amazing sync. They played some of their all time hits like "Thick as a Brick", "Too Old to Rock n Roll" and "Heavy Horses" . Moreover there was no screaming and screeching like in the usual rock shows!

As they say the best is saved for the last, I was smitten by the fusion by both Jethro Tull and Anoushka. It was a perfect blend of Classical and Western music forms. This provides a huge platform for our Indian music to reach to better heights in today's world of music. I thoroughly enjoyed the fusion part and that stands out to be the highlight of the show for me!

All in all amidst all the rallies and chaos lost in the storm of terrorism, this was a good break for me and I am sure for all those who were a part of this concert!

Break the Habit....

2008-11-28T01:08:00.000-08:00

If it is the habit of the leaders of a country to cover up their mistakes, then break the habit. If it is the habit of the politicians to play the blame game, then break the habit. If it is the habit of the Intelligence groups to play safe at the cost of losing lives, then break the habit.

Our country needs to be prudent enough to be prepared for such outrageous attacks on innocent people in advance. And if they fail in that, they atleast need to promptly respond to the stimulus when terror breaks out in an unimaginable manner. If they are not able to convert any one of these, then they just need to quit and give the compass to others who can handle it. There is no hierarchy of power, no balance of information, no availability of resources, no preemptive efforts and no cooperation from the high command. If the attacks on Mumbai are what the Government is waiting to tighten their Intelligence, Law and Order then it is a shame on them. If they are not able to see beyond the invisible, then how are they different from the common man?

My home is no more a safe place for me to stay! Where do I take shelter then? It is extremely disgraceful to watch the foreigners dread to come to our country. I feel like an untouchable when guests are just leaving my home and going away. The trauma that each hostage faced is incomprehensible. Every second is like a million years for them. But on the outside for the people who are supposed to protect a million years is like a second! Why should the NSG wait until morning 11:00 am to go to the battle field? Why should the M-17s be deployed only 24 hours after the attack?

For me it is no more the Prime Minister or the Home Minister who are in control. The situation reflects the media having the utmost concern for the victims. It is they who actually are on their toes to rise to the occasion. If they can keep the people aware and sympathize with them, if they can make conclusions and draw solutions, then why cannot the Home Minister have the minimum courtesy to do so? Amidst these chaos and frantic fears it is the opportunistic politics that leaders can think of. The mediocre speech delivered by the PM had nothing in it. Not a word of comfort, not a word of assurance! Expecting just a line from my very own leader is a big joke!

Our pledge says and I quote “To my country and my people, I pledge my devotion. In their well being and prosperity alone, lies my happiness” I hope the Home Minister acts like a citizen at the least. He seems to be happy in our ill being and destruction alone! What protection was he able to give to the ATS Chief? How can he send a 56 year old man dressed in a formal blue shirt and black trousers into the war zone? These people should be the master minds behind the operation and make things happen. Their duty is to run the show and not to play the game. Now how invaluable has it turned out to have lost him. Can you get back the experience, exposure and knowledge lost? Do you see Osama Bin Laden coming and fighting anywhere? Do you see the Al Qaeda or the Lashkar chiefs coming into the battle fields? They steer the rod, they maneuver the troops.

Where is the distribution of power? Where are the secured guidelines? Where is the integrity? Where is the coordination of groups? Where is the use of technology? How can we tackle the terrorists if we take a back seat in using the most modern infrastructure to counteract them? The terrorists make the best use of all the available resources to keep themselves well equipped and well informed at all times. If they are smart then we need to be smarter and that is how it works!

It is time to break the habits of those lapses in security, intelligence, law and order. Give the people in command what they need. Give them the power to take decisions independently and swiftly. Give them the authority to handle situations in their own way while monitoring them. Structure the Intelligence personnel and allot defined duties and responsibilities. Delay is poison and it will only make the infection worse and eventually fatal! This incident is going to change the world view of our country. I cannot fathom the isolation that we will have to face for the coming years. The damage caused in the minds of those country men and outsiders can turn out to be irreparable.

Power, knowledge, determination and accountability alone can instill a sense of security among the citizens. It is better to fix the disease in the early stages than mess up in the advanced conditions. The diagnosis needs to be done and transformed into complete solutions. Let today be a hard and strong reminder of our faults and a lighthouse to direct our future.

I wish...

2008-11-12T20:58:00.000-08:00

I wish the night would end now,
I am dying to see the dawn…
Wallowing in my fears, hanging in hope
My reality is my only nightmare
I can’t succumb anymore to this pain
When is the day of deliverance?
The moon and stars are lovely
Lo! Their light is drowned in my darkness
I can’t wait any longer to see the day
Oh! It’s the next revulsion of this life
Yet another day of dismay passes by…….

I am struggling to hold back my tears
The fear of the future is weaker than
The power derived from my past….
I am a soldier but I am also human
I fight unto death and I fight for life
There is no mine; it’s all yours…..
There is no turning back until death….
Tired of washing the blood of my fingers
I am today; there may not be a tomorrow….

Quantum of Discomfort!

2008-11-09T22:52:00.000-08:00

After the retirement of Pierce Brosnan as the Bond, there was very little motivation for me to go and watch Daniel Craig. Though I watched Casino Royale which has had very li'l bonding to my good books, me and my bro went on to "Quantum of Solace". The driving factor was the critics rating that was 7.6! However I did not find it worth more than a 5.5..Are you alarmed? Well even so was I...

Too much of talking, relatively less action and kinda creepy sentiment which made it all the more drab! It was vengeance for his so called love in the previous movie but I was all the while so confused! I dint make head or tail until half time and was expecting for something to actually break through after the break! But I still had to break my head!

There is hardly anything that stands out..even the much hyped Bond theme for the season given by Alicia Keys and Jack White also did not seem to impress me...All in all it was an OK types of movie with not much to be considered except for the hard work put in by Craig to make a mark. He might be a topic for the critics but does not seem to be the Bond that people like me watch out for!

Fools of the Nation!

2008-10-29T22:08:00.000-07:00

The other day I was browsing through the TV channels and finally landed on one seeing Sylvester Stalone. It was Rambo- First blood 2. I watched it in bits and pieces as I shuffled through the other stuff. There was one extra ordinary scene in the movie that caught my attention like never before. In the end while Rambo walks away after he accomplishes his mission, the Colonel stops him. He insists Rambo to stay back, apparently no one would want to lose such young combative fighting machine. Rambo without much thought refutes and continues to walk away. Then the officer placates him saying "What do you want?" as if very assuredly he was willing to give it right away. Then comes the killer dialogue, he gives a contemptuous reply "What do I want? I want what these people want. I want my country to love me the way I love it."

Boy! What a dialogue? I know it is in contrast to this well known quote which goes something like this "Before you ask what the country has done for you, ask yourself what you have done for the country." I could not agree more but all the while I would also want my country to love me right? I mean with all these chaos in Maharashtra and unrest in Bihar, Orissa and UP, there are many who would be echoing along with me. People are being killed, beaten, brutally harassed and the list will go on. But where is that assurance that I am longing from my country. Where people are ready to die for this country, all I see is people being killed. When is the line going to be drawn? Can it get worse than now? I suffer from insecurity, lack of assurance, lack or protection, deprivation of justice and the only thing that keeps me alive is hope.

I wish there was some potion of wisdom which these people can drink. A potion that will wake them up from the night mares we are living in. Or on the other side I wish there was some anaesthesia for the country men to endure all lamentation and grief without any sensation of pain and shame. It is no more the rulers of the nation running the country but I see the fools of the nation gaming with peoples lives. I guess that would be a perfect title for a movie to let go of all the vexation that is piling up like the lava under the mountain waiting to erupt like a volcano. Yes they are the "Fools of the Nation!" They need help before they turn into a bunch of sissies rolling in the dirt rather than cleaning it up.

Lousy Lucy!!

2008-10-23T23:27:00.000-07:00

It has been hard to beat against the winds of lousiness just to keep my ever closing eyes open. A stupefying fact here is that I can sleep for more than 12 hours at ease. Is that normal? I hope so. It is kinda corny to work at home with the alluring bed by your side and your bedsheets and pillows calling you to get cozy. Boy I can say this is harder than standing the seduction of your dreamboy by the road! Excuse me for that bad wit but looks like I am still drowsy.

I read two books recently To Kill a Mocking Bird and The Catcher, In the Rye and it was irritating to find that the best part of both the books was to do with the bro-sis sentiment. I am no hater of that sentiment though but just that I don't get to see that in my real life actually chafes me!! Anyways I count these to be fortunate to atleast remind me that there is such thing in life!! Well I would recommend the first book which is all about these wild childhood dreams that we have had. Harper Lee did an excellent job is recording the emotions and drama of a little girl who is ever enthued and tomboyish!! I guess that was why I could identify myself very much with it. And ofcourse the angry young man types of brother that she had was just like my bro!

I remember once when I was around 10-12 years old and my bro was just one and a half year elder to me. We were getting bored to death during our vacation and decided to play cricket. I always had this attitude not to go and ask my brother. So he came up to me and asked if I would like to play cricket. Girls as you know have this knack of making people beg. So I allowed my brother to convince me for quite sometime. My Mom knew my trick and smacked me on my back and told me not be a sissy..Are mothers really our best friends??? That was what I thought...Finally I set out to play on a condition that I would bat first. Obviously there was no toss n all.. The deal was I bat six overs and then I bowl six overs. So I batted happily the first six overs and made my bro run all over the place..Finally it was my turn to bowl and I was kinda tired.. I began to give some lame excuse saying that some cartoon was coming on TV and I would like to watch it...It sometimes sucks when brothers read sisters very well..He knew I was trying to escape and began to force me to bowll which eventually turned into a fight..I ran onto to the terrace to escape him but boy his stamina was lots better than mine..He became real furious! He was catching hold of my neck and threatening to throw me down if I did not bowl for him..Can you believe that?? No right?? I know he was trying to kill me and I was very sure that Shaktimaan will come and kick him while I would be rescued safely! What happened next? Don't ask me..I was so angry that Shaktimaan did not turn up but my Dad came running to my rescue..I mean why Dad?? The rest of the story is the uninteresting part where my bro won my Dad and I had to bowl for the rest of that forsaken day..I only wished it would rain or get dark suddenly due to some solar eclipse...

The second book I would not recommend to anyone! But I am sure people now will defnitely want to read it coz of the curiosity levels pushing up :) J.D Salinger did get excellent reviews for the book but somehow I began to feel much more lousy as I read it... Again the book is about one young fella for whom nothing under the sun except his sister could interest him! Oh how I wish....forget it...Hmm I was kinda getting senti reading all this stuff.....

Anyways I shall go and catch up with some coffee before I sleep off...
More later guys......Ciao...

McCain Strikes Obama Stands!

2008-10-15T20:49:00.000-07:00

This was by far one of the best debates I have seen. I tell this not only by the quality of the discussion but more importantly by the quality of the questions and the way Bob lead them to. There were several issues that were ignored in the past like the supreme court and abortion that came up today. It was interesting to observe striking differences in both cases. Well since I watched the later half of the debate I can only say that Obama cracked open from his defensive flat shell that he has been hiding behind over weeks. He was more to the people's actual needs and reforms which I am sure was welcomed by the people of America. His answers to questions on strengthening education primarily which is an bi-implication to national security and economy outplayed McCains answers to change of reforms right from the 4th and 5th grades. But when it came to "Joe the plumber" I think McCain gave a better assertive answer by attacking Obama's tax policies. Also McCain gave one heavy weight statement saying that he is not George Bush by distancing himself from the failed economic policies of Bush. This earned him few points but I think will not be bought by most of the Independents out there. Both of them once again spoke about where they stand on their economic policies and how they can help the distressed people of American from this present situation.

One interesting feature of the debate was McCain showing his unprecedented "angry old man" expressions which was not accepted in the right way by most of the viewers. However the republicans say that he spoke like "fighter pilot" and so has been offensive and made his point clear which is required sometimes in a debate. But this point would be highlighted by the Democrats who would be showing the fact that a uncool Senator who cannot control his temperament could be a man they would not want to see in the coming term. Having not watched the first 30min I go by the verdict which says McCain came out stronger but later began to drag on certain personal issues and gave more attention to attacking rather than addressing the actual issues. Obama however did really well by being composed in the end and I think he made more sense to me than McCain.

By opinion polls where democrats were a larger portion of the viewers Obama seems to be significantly leading. Winning all the three debates in a row I think Obama has a slightly greater chance than McCain though today's debate unravelled Senator McCain's best! So McCain won most of the points but lost the debate. This looks like the path for McCain's win is narrowing down with three strikes in a row!

None to care for a Nun!!

2008-10-05T00:27:00.000-07:00

I am so distressed at the state affairs of Orissa all through the Kandhmal row. I have many a things to crib about and many more to condemn. I know it would not make much of a difference but atleast I will let go of my frustration.

It has been around 40 days since this atrocity took place in Kandhmal where a Nun was brutally dragged on the road and raped in broad daylight. All this happened while the locals and even the police men were standing "like stones" in her words just as spectators. There was another Father who tried to fight back and protect the sister. But these criminals poured kerosene all over the Father and threatened to burn him alive. She went around begging for help crying that she was like their sister and mother but in vain. Hiding behind the police men did not refrain these anti social elements from pulling her hair and getting hold of her neck and tearing her saree, her blouse and eventually her bra. One of them fell on her, harassed her and raped her. They were also speaking among themselves that 100 of them will gang rape her and leave her on the street followed by monstrous laughter's. It might sound gross but these are exactly the words used by her to describe the incident a night mare which she chooses not to forget.

It was more than 40days that she filed an FIR and until now there was no action or atleast a response from the police. Even the media comes to its senses only now to focus on the incident and make it an issue. Probably they were too busy covering the Nuke deal, Orissa floods, the Home Ministers' overdressing and all the entertainment news!!! I reckon the injustice against the minorities seem to draw their attention only to a minor proportion. Better late than never, media now looks to mount pressure on the state government while the Centre is still battling with their thoughts about imposing President's rule. If stopping such violence is one task then heeding to the rescue of the victimized so far is another important task. This injustice against Christians is being condemned by people all over the world. It is an insult to India if it ignores its duty to protect the minorities and make sure security measures are provided.

The sister is in no fluctuation to fight for justice. She says she still has the mental and physical strength to see that justice is done and all those people including the onlookers are subjected to punishment. She says she has lost faith in the Orissa police which is an utter shame to them. I being an optimistic minority (christian) literally lost hope and can give in written affirming such things will definitely repeat in the future and will again lack the prudence of the police. India is losing the dignity and pride of boasting about itself as a secular country with such abhorrent incidents and indolent administration.

God save India!!

I aint...........

2008-09-21T10:30:00.000-07:00

I aint have the words to say
I aint have the heart to feel
I aint have the love to live
I aint the person I wanna be
Where is the honey? Where is the touch?
Sour and malign is all I am
My thoughts subtle and catastrophic
Flickering lights pass by my night
Death in my life and in my dreams
I reckon it will soon be over
Can it get any worse than now?
My present has leveled my past
Happy hours ecstatic days
No more whining and groaning
I reckon it will be the end
It’s gonna be fine!!
I’m gonna live it through!!

Lukewarm start!!

2008-09-21T09:35:00.000-07:00

After having a lukewarm start this season the Reds have a lot of catching up to do. There have been significant positives that could be extracted with their 0-0 draw with Villareal. Parker who stole the show in the Champions League match however could not pull it off in today's match against Chelsea. It was a hard fought match with many chances created on both sides and many cards very freely dispatched to ManU.

With a 1-0 lead more than three quarters of the match the Reds just could not handle the pressure and possess the ball to pocket a win. Neither did the entry of their star player Ronaldo and the attacker Tevez bring any luck to Dr.Alex. However Kalou from Chelsea who was substituted did make a difference with an easy go header in the 80th minute to draw the match in the end. Reds continue to tail the EPL table and are yet to warm up a level from their mediocre performances. They need to settle down soon and pull up their socks!! Specially the costly Berbatov needs to get acclimatized to ManU as his game was all over the place today.

The arch rivals Arsenal do have some good news with todays result as they top the chart but have in shelf all the bigs game ahead. Way to go ManU!! You guys still rock!! :D

It's my life!!! :P

2008-09-17T23:23:00.000-07:00

I love the life in this song....

12 Stones - My life

A Beautiful Day...

2008-09-17T19:03:00.000-07:00

"It's a new day bright and lovely
I wake up to see the world anew
No more illusions no more dreams
It is all real and its my life

I gotta live it out loud
I oughta soar over the past
I still believe I can make it
I see the horizon I see hope"

Alcohol or Alcoholics???

2008-09-04T05:14:00.000-07:00

It might be bewildering for many who read the title of my post. Well one of my friends who read my previous posts made an interesting and in fact debatable point today saying that you may hate alcohol and for that matter you may even hate an alcoholic but you cannot hate alcoholics. What he was trying to say was that.....

well well before that there is something very freakishly coincidental that occurred today. I was watching TV and randomly choose Z Studio. It was screening the movie "When a man loves a woman". For me love is something which Shakespeare corrupted or the world adulterated. It is much more complicated and intricate than its being depicted largely in today's world. Surely that is completely a different discussion. Nonetheless since the name of the movie sounded attractive I continued to stick on to that channel. Few minutes later did I realize that it was about a couple with two girls and the mother(played by Meg Ryan) was an alcoholic. Though I have not explicitly slept over the whole concept of alcohol, it kept flashing in my mind. And so I decide to write and come here and then am puzzled to check my friend's offline messages trying to elaborate on his point.Okay now that you guys have the background I will get back to where I left.

So what my friend was trying to say was that being an alcoholic is something that may be referred to as a character or to a habit. One cannot hate a person because of his habits but has every right if it is pertaining to the character. So far so good! Sounds fair enough. And then I told him that what I meant was when the habits become too demanding and sneak into the sphere of your character and are in a position to determine a person's integrity. I have seen how alcohol has turned boys into beasts, sons into morons who beat up their mothers, husbands into wives-harassing animals, girls into prostitutes, mothers into unstable and imbalanced parents, fathers into adulterers... So my point is can there be one real good reason for a person to consume alcohol?? Is it to show of the social status, pride or prestige as it is termed as social drinking in today's world?? Or is it to strip of the real character behind the plastic face we see?? Or is it to bring on guts and an emotional high spirit?? Or is it to beat another emotion of miserable and disheartening past?? Or is it just for the sake of besotting or so called habit??

It is not about good or bad. It is about right and wrong. It is about permissible and beneficial. I really wonder if there is any one out there who cares about what I am saying..It might a be dumb meaningless absurd chatter but I think giving it a thought is worth it. Apparently there seems to be more bad than good because of alcohol.. If not why would there be so much of deliberation on restricting alcoholic sales?? Why do people drink secretly?? Why do people buy at the cost of starving their families?? Why is it repeatedly warned that is it destined to degrade your health?? Young folks and teenagers say they have it for fun or may be for that "thrill". But we all know how many people have been victimized because of drunken driving, because of the time pass activity turning into a habitual ritual, lives being torn apart and careers having tumbled down.

What else can I say?? It is left to an individual. We all are rational thinkers and are not blind followers of customs, traditions and more importantly those silly stupid practices. If I am right then stop for a moment and contemplate on what you just read. I may not have convinced you fully because that is not my intention. There is nothing that I would want from you but you should want from yourselves. Having the guts to say no to a crowd who think boozing is an emblem of status is what I call character. Walking away by saying no to a bunch of rovers at the cost of losing your identity is what I call integrity. Living in reality and looking at the problems of life in the face is what I call courage. Standing upright and being yourself rather than pretending to be a hero to cover the coward in you is what I call personality!

p.s To clarify about my previous post..I hate and condemn the alcoholic in a person but not the person himself!

No Pain No Gain!!

2008-09-01T21:51:00.000-07:00

I did not know what it is to be an alcoholic until yesterday morning! Ok ok don't get into a cloud potential I meant Workaholic!! But I guess alcohol is more pleasure unlike work-ahol... Anyways I am not going to poke my nose into the discussion of alcohol coz I absolutely hate alcohol and alcoholics...On the other hand I don't like work either.. but atleast I don't hate it...

yesterday my day started at 5:30am and as I started to work from 6:00am... I was unconscious of the fact that a normal human being would have breakfast in the morning. Yaya I was being a work animal! So skipping my morning intake I was completely engrossed in my work ofcourse I was not enjoying it! Nevertheless I had to do it coz "no pain no gain".. Then comes lunch time and still the workahol continued to bewitch..the sway never ended until night 10:30pm..Finally I get to have a light supper.. Working from home is not a bed of roses as some may expect yet it to be. For me it turns out to be a penultimate bed of pains and aches by the time I call it a day.

Anyways I just thought I would sneak out from my workaholic world to breathe some air of the free world!!

Back to my work closet.........

My Redeemer Lives - Team Hoyt

2008-09-01T21:22:00.000-07:00

Incredible video about the relationship between a father and son.... and God's relationship with us.

Villians of the Valley!!

2008-08-28T20:40:00.000-07:00

This is a very well dissected and canvassed article about the issues infact the people haunting the Valley of Kashmir!!

Thanks to Sudhir who directed me to this link!

http://indiatoday.digitaltoday.in/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=13574&Itemid=1&issueid=68&sectionid=3&limit=1&limitstart=1

Terror strikes again!!!

2008-07-27T00:47:00.000-07:00

Within a span of 24hours the nation has witnessed 26 bomb blasts in two major cities which completely shook and stunned everyone. What is happening all around? I wonder what is running through every one's mind. The Intelligence in whom we confide seems to be proving incompetency and inefficiency. The law and order situation seems to be draining over the years. If the government and the police are working as they say where are the results? Even before we fully came out of the Jaipur blasts the terrorists have struck again. Day by day I see the terrorists and anti- social elements growing in strength at a faster rate than our security and protection forces. The accused in the previous blasts have not yet been brought to justice. Is it still right in playing it safe?? It is high time that we stop planning and start doing. We don't want any more speeches and condemnations. Any more of those stay calm and stand united slogans!! Any school going kid would go and read such a speech in the public. Such words will not breathe life into the dead nor heal the scars of the wounded nor ease the petrified. So talking should be saved until the performing is done. Those in authoritative positions should show their faces to the public only after they have done something with their brains and guts. What use do all those high command meetings have if they are not able to produce results and provide safety. The safety at the borders becomes insignificant at these times when internally we are chaotic and the menace levels keep rising.
It is frustrating to the IB and RAW as they are not able to nail those people who are responsible for such atrocious and abominable acts. This is understandable only to a certain extent. Now they have jumped and crossed over that line and need to come to terms and consensus on identifying those insects of the society and burn them alive. I fail to call these acts of cowardice like the other big heads in the nation call. They have the courage to play around with one of the most effficient intelligence groups in the world and they have the grits to grab the nerves of an entire nation and leave them in fear and threat. They are no cowards!! Our fight against terrorism will never end until the end of times. We cannot relax and wash off our hands after a cumbersome process of investigation and interrogation post such incidents without any output. The families who have lost their dear one are unfillable. The void continues to remain and can only be attempted to filled if we ever show them that we are concerned by punishing the cause. The condolences and compensations are equal to dust and rags if they are not converted into justice. The only comfort if I can say that can be rendered to them is to see that all those who were a reason for the deaths are brought to justice and thrown out of the society!

Nothing to fear!!!

2008-07-17T04:16:00.000-07:00

There's nothing to fear
You're as good as the best,

As strong as the mightiest, too.
You can win in every battle or test;
For there's no one just like you.
There's only one you in the world today;
So nobody else, you see,
Can do your work in as fine a way:
You're the only you there'll be !

So face the world, and all life is yours
To conquer and love and live:
And you'll find the happiness that endures
In just the measure you give;
There's nothing too good for you to possess,
Nor heights where you cannot go:
Your power is more than belief or guess
It is something you have to know.

There is nothing to fear
You can and you will.
For you are the invincible you.
Set your foot on the highest hill
There's nothing you cannot do.

-- Author Unknown

I'm free!!!

2008-07-17T03:45:00.001-07:00

I'm free I'm free

I want to climb the wisdom tree

What do I do? I have no clue

It is raining and I feel blue

No birds out there in the sky

I can't fly but still I can try

I eat I drink I'm tired I sleep

Drowned in daydreams so deep

One and two and three

I'm free and I'm free!! :)

Complacency of Knowledge!!

2008-07-17T03:28:00.000-07:00

Knowledge is like an ocean. It can be clearly concluded without much analysis that our knowledge is just like a drop in the ocean. Learning is a continuous process, which excavates the depths of our understanding and worldview. I wonder of the day when we reach a phase of complacency in our lives. Unfortunately reaching that stage would be an implication of our stagnant growth and retarding yearning for more. In other words a complacent satisfaction with present knowledge is the chief bar to the pursuit of knowledge.

In this fast advancing world of politics, power, war, entertainment, sports, love and technology one should strive to search for a moment where there is nothing in excess for us to learn and live. The impeccable fact here is that the more we learn and are mindful of the current affairs, the more lies the weight of accountability on us. I mean you cannot know that your neighbor is dying and do nothing about it. Like the land which sucks up the rain and yields thorns to the one who farmed it, we would turn out to be the unworthy, useless and burnt away lot. This instills a thought whether we should be cognizant of the happenings or not. I opine that we need to be people of stimulus and reaction rather than a dead log of wood. Like a land that absorbs the rain and bears fruit to the one who farmed it!! As it is truly said the great end of life is not knowledge but action.

The right use of knowledge is wisdom. There might be people who have great knowledge but they turn out to be greater fools. So using our knowledge judicially, humanely, lovingly and socially makes you a better human being. If we fail to practice what we preach then we would land nowhere. The right application of knowledge is wisdom. Wisdom would not come knocking at your doorstep but demands to be searched for. So having knowledge differs from being wise. Knowledge speaks but wisdom acts!

Ingestion of the little details of any event leads to more anxiety and apprehension about the future and about the next episode. For some it is a joy to know about new stuff and to venture into versatile fields. For some it is a joy to share the minutest particulars they get to know. Avoiding the situations where you would be the pumpkin in a discourse related to different domains sometimes gets to your nerves. A lover of sports like me may discover something in common with the football fanatics or cricket freaks. This expands the radius of the circle of your knowledge, and ultimately the exchange of ideas and thoughts make you more involved. From then on whether you like it or not you would be sailing on a boat of information and data covering events and the latest buzz.

When you are at the luncheon table or in a cab with your friends or out at an eatery or walking aimlessly on the streets, the best thing you can do is chat with your company. Once you start to follow a serial, a league, a tournament, a reality show or a competition you always end up in interesting conversations with others. Many of our relations are built on all those silly conversations, which strangely end up forming strong roots and bonds. The ingrained witty lines of our friends sometimes crack up the situation to make the atmosphere livelier!

Exchange of information is a beautiful concept in which each one of us is involuntarily a part and parcel of. Its never ending power and never dying significance enthrall me. Early in the morning the news papers and news channels share the latest headlines which when found interesting and buzzing would land up at the breakfast tables, office desks, and women’s gossip zone! Expurgating the actual news, masala is added to it to make it even spicier and by the time the news reaches the last person it would be too spicy to taste! It is ineluctable to say that information does not imply knowledge. On the basis of information, knowledge is built and on the basis on knowledge, wisdom is built. All these three are exclusively distinct and cannot be substituted for the other.

More appealing than knowledge is the feeling of knowledge. It drives you to a high and boosts your confidence. It makes you run the extra mile on the road of cognizance and makes you feel proud. The alarming fact here is man’s memory is volatile and it tends to work like a queue where the old facts drop out eventually as we gather the new. So it is indispensible that we free our brains from the undesirable data. We are drowning in information and craving for knowledge. Nevertheless wanting to know more and extending your boundaries of knowledge is a good practice. This extension makes the unconscious, conscious; the foolish, wise and the poor, rich in terms of knowledge.

The craze for money when replaced by the craze for knowledge would result in a nation of character and integrity. None would be standing on sinking grounds but on solid rocks as their foundations have been laid hard. Rejuvenate those stem cells of knowledge and keep triggering those grey cells frequently so that even unmistakably the feeling of complacency doesn’t creep in and spread like a tumor!

I would like to end with the quote by Socrates “True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing.”

The Red Blood!!!

2008-05-12T08:06:00.000-07:00

It was such an astounding dramatic climax for the entertaining 9 month fight by the English football clubs for the title of EPL'07 and it was hard earned by none other than the proud Red Devils!! Man U walked out with the championship as Chelsea failed to tie up scoring the same number of points with the title deciding fixtures on Sunday. The day saw even Sir Alex Ferguson tip toeing on his feet as Giggs gave a perfect finish to the match with his aplomb goal which puts the tenth title for the Reds in their bag. The Reds Legend Sir Bobby was pleased to see Giggs equalling his record of 758 appearances and wrapping it up in style. Now as all eyes move on to the Champions league title with the Reds pumping with confidence and Chelsea in a battle to prove their power it would be a wonderful event to watch out for.

Heights of......

2008-04-28T03:41:00.000-07:00

I've been to the Mother Teresa's Home for destitutes and old people yesterday. I visited that place a number of times earlier and each time it was special. This time I found that there were certain heights I had to reach in life (may be for you too check out :P)
Heights of hospitality:
When I being a stranger was welcomed and treated very lovingly by the sisters and the people living there.
Heights of trust:
When the residents took all the medicines the helpers gave without even enquiring and when they did whatever was told without grumbling.
Heights of faith:
When a young orphan girl tells me with jubilation that her mother would come one day to take her home and her wait will end very soon.
Heights of cleanliness:
When most of them -old, physically and mentally challenged maintain the place spic n span and keep their belongings neat and tidy.
Heights of sacrifice:
When little girls who go to schools and colleges simultaneosly render help to the destitutes relentlessly in every possible way.
Heights of endurance:
When a lady bears all the pain caused by her hard stomach filled with the pebbles and chips of stones she eats unknowingly.
Heights of concern:
When a old lady, mentally sick and physically weak tells me that her arm is hurting; when later to my shock I was told that she helps in washing the clothes of others!
Heights of romance:
When a 90 year old man who is almost blind takes a passport size picture of his wife (my old woman -as he calls) from his pocket and cries telling me that she is no more and he misses her!

Hurrayyyyy!!!!!!

2008-04-15T03:26:00.001-07:00

It was a super sunday for the Indian ManU fans!! The double treat comes from the Indians leveling the SA test series and ManU defeating Arsenal on their winning spree!
After an exciting football thriller between the arch rivals Arsenal, Man utd put them down by 2-1. It was an awesome game with some flip flops starting from the decent missed chances by Adebayor to his controversial hand goal which was later balanced by the hand ball of Gallas earning a Ronaldo converted penalty to the reds and a superb match winning free kick by Hargreaves. This ends the Gunners dream of chasing the EPL title. Now only the 5 point lagging Chelsea can stop united from having their hands on the title.

Does love kill??

2008-04-11T04:00:00.000-07:00

What's wrong with all these alleged lovers? Is it so humiliating to be rejected that it costs a life? Well the murder attempt of an engineering girl unfortunately from my town of Vijayawada seemed to have added fuel to the fire. This dangerous violent posessive expression of love belies the essence of it. It is bewildering to grasp the fact that some one so loving, wanting and caring turns out to be a criminal in the end. Bossing over and winning over doesn't become love. Oh wow! looks like all these incidents are teaching us what love should not be like. So folks "love makes life beautiful" would in these circumstances transform to be "loves makes life dreadful". Anyways ending in a comic note I suggest you guys not to love. That would be an end to this "social issue". :) or may be to be more diplomatic I can put it like be a patient waiter till you get the right one! What say??

Red Devils march on!!!!

2008-04-09T23:42:00.000-07:00

Okay I am not trying to be spooky by saying "red devils" but it seems that Manchester United has been sending strong signals to the other teams. They have done a commendable job this year after being under tremendous pressure at the end 2007 when the Aresenal guns were leading by margin of 5 points. Manutd's come back has spread the spirit of football and shown how the game has to be played. The blend of Ronaldo's style and Rooney's speed always marvels me every time they come onto the battle field and have certainly been nightmares for the opponents.

Arsenal are truly guns.. They play a more aggressive and entertaining game which keeps you glued to your seats all the while but unfortunately have been the victims for some dodgy decisions and their manager Arsene Wenger had made substitutions in some games which turned out to be fatal for their title chase. They were the most criticized team but always proved their critics wrong.

Chelsea and Liverpool were a mediocre relatively yet with some flashes of brilliance by Drogba, and Gerrard have found their stand still in the race. After their comfortable march over Roma, I'm awaiting for the dream semi final of Barcelona and Manutd. So with some fate deciding matches ahead its gonna be exciting to watch which one of these teams actually head to their destiny.

From where to where?

2008-04-09T21:52:00.000-07:00

This post of mine has been animated by one pumped up conversation that I had with my friends when we were in Idikki, a beautiful hill station in Kerala. De facto it was a frivolous blabber but surely left me in a thought.

“What is your profession?” You can expect a majority to reply “I am into IT/Software.” What does this IT sector contain in itself that people are willingly abdicating their present to step into an uncertain future. It was predicted in the year 2004 that some time between 2008 and 2010, annual export revenues from India's information technology (IT) sector would promisingly hit $50 billion, up from $16.3 billion, which is a spectacular growth curve and is indisputable to become reality with the Satyams, Wipros , Infosys and the like.

Over the years the services sectors like nanotechnology, biotechnology, pharmaceuticals, aviation, tourism and telecommunication have not been in the limelight for inevitable reasons. Government’s investment into various sectors is destined to have either a direct or indirect impact on the alarming social issues that the country is facing. There has been an undeniable tremendous support and influence of the IT sector on the nation’s economy. Nevertheless what about the services sectors of the country? Especially when all the knowledgeable, elite and eloquent are in a rat race to jump into the IT sector? The so called noble teaching profession now finds itself in equation with the software eccentrics. The IT professionals find it soothing to end their careers as teaching professionals for want of gratification which is often hard to earn all their life. On the other side of the equation are the teachers who unable to resist the fight for resources and luxury find it easier to earn bucks in the IT field.

The standpoint of the Indian government plays a demanding role in deciding where the agricultural, manufacturing and other sectors go from here on. The percentage share contributions of the economic potentiality reflecting agriculture and manufacture sectors to the GDP have not been remarkably impressive over the years. Hardly do we find knowledgeable people pursuing their career in those areas of profession due to fear of deficient pay and ecstasy for the lush of life and a status in the society. India is rich in natural resources and labor. The judicious usage of the available resources can turn the tables over in transforming our society into an estimable one. There is so much of pomp and ballyhoo when it comes to even the minutest detailing of the IT field whereas relatively on the other hand we barely get to see the happenings in the other sectors.

Rather than playing the blame game, it would be encouraging to strive in creating cognizance in our people about the less favored significant spheres of work. Boosting to endeavor to appreciable levels of development and support in other domains would serve in the well rounded development of the nation. At that juncture, we can affirmably state that our country is developing in a holistic point of reference. One day may come when we find civil servants, agriculturists or even scientists in extinction considering the proportion of students engaging to be either doctors or more dominantly software engineers after their 10th grade. Only one of say 100 educatees or even more would actually go for a research study in their field of expertise or for officialdom. To serve the country was putatively a baronial cause to fight for but now it turns out to be the least preferred. It remains questionable about from where, to where have we moved in terms of our world view.

Investigating the ways and routes to reach that zenith where we are ruled by the educated and enlightened front is called for. That would be a day which I would be looking forward for and promisingly be a time when every Indian hopes to find a solution to his age old ever persisting problems of life.

Voice of Hope!!

2008-02-14T22:26:00.000-08:00

These words inspired me.............

I almost gave in
I almost lost
This day almost got to me
Into the air my hands I tossed
Almost walked away
Almost cried
Almost threw caution into the wind
Happiness for myself
I almost denied
Almost.......
Then.....
I felt a brush of love against my face
Wings wrapped around me in a warm embrace
I heard a whisper into my ear...
"Don't you ever give up, I'm right here"

Shocked or Expected???

2007-12-31T01:48:00.000-08:00

I was in a state of shock when I heard of Benazir Bhutto's assassination. Death is inevitable but when it is decided by someone other than the Creator one should give it a serious thought. It is so chilling to see and hear all about Bhutto's end in the media. She was a charismatic politician with her ideals and beliefs. One moment we see this figure cutting through the news and making headlines about her chances of being the next Prime Minister of Pakistan and the very next moment we find her no more. Her courage and composure are commendable. I am not sure if she was controversial or equipoise but death calls for calm.

How can one take the other's life into one's hands and play with it. The death of nearly 150 innocent people or even more evokes a fear in me. Today it is Pakistan tomorrow it can be anywhere. There can be a enumeration of the reasons behind all these killings. God only knows why and how these massacres can be stopped. It puts me in deep struggle to understand what can be the reason behind people not able to live in harmony with their neighbours to the extent of brutally taking one's life. Bhutto or others would have anticipated this to happen to her but not in such a short span and in this cold manner. Waves of death are hovering all round Pakistan at this time and will not consume much time to touch the shores of India and other nations. Can such anti social elements ever be forgiven? I wish I had the mind of God to actually judge in such situations.

The blame game has always had its way in these circumstances eventually fleeting the cause to be fought for. "I am tired of life!" these words are frequently used by me, I guess the revised version would be "I am tired of death!". It is intractable on the part of anyone for that matter to have claimed the lives of hundreds and thousands and should be brought to justice.

4 wheels!! 2 eyes!!

2007-12-28T07:36:00.000-08:00

I was exuberant about driving a car but very soon I changed my mind! I enjoy the ride looking around and pulling my brother's leg in the driver's seat....later when we swap our positions the real fun starts not for me but the others.. One has two eyes but a hazaar things to be cautious about..three mirrors, the road, the passers by , the traffic police taking shade under some tree,blah blah!! never been to a driving school though.. steadiness is all that matters!! The imprudence with which I handle the steering brings the others in the car to their nerves yet I somehow derive a sadistic pleasure in doing so n watching it..Any person who can drive on Indian roads and this heavy traffic..each following their own set of rules..can do pretty well in grand prix :P!! Shucks!! look at the cattle, the pedestrians, cyclists and what not..everyone under the sun fights for their space and is out there to dash the road ..To extrapolate things no matter how careful you are, you are destined to hit atleast once in a day...I wonder that would be a reason for my perspiration rates to go up when I steer..I would be a lunatic if I just kept waiting like a good citizen, smiling sweetly and making way for the others..which I tried once but got a "what the heck!!!" kinda look !! It is said that our life sometimes takes on bumpy ride...i gotta chance to actually experience it while I was driving on paths filled with pot holes and none caring a damn to inter them for years!!..My vote now would go for the two wheels which is so easily manageable and peaceful...Filled with so much excitement, anxiety and fear..I bet its so hard to go out there and drive ..the funny thing is we get to greet people and get to know more folks each time u run into a accident...it can turn out to be an unpleasant meeting though..i guess a lil wit and a lil road sense can keep me going!! Awaiting for my next hit (and may be run this time)!!!! ofcourse I would not be claiming the life of any person or animal.. :) !!

Pushing the Limits >>>>

2007-11-12T04:27:00.000-08:00

It's been a tiresome day. What did I do?? Hmm surely not nothing but something which finally reflects nothing. I am trying to expurgate my mind at the end as I call it a day...looking at these lights focussing on me here, thinking of getting back to my abode and berating myself for all the work I gotto do. I guess now I get a proper welcome to the corporate world!! haha.. This would be my story and this would be my song for the days to come.

It keeps going on and on... the sky is the limit to my germinary vexation at work. :)) Never mind I guess one fine day I would exchange it with a good output!! Monday morning after a long break of 3 days is something difficult to even gobble in my mind. I am sure it wud be the same for all those software eccentrics out there!! :) I donno what revolution I am bringing in this world of technology and life going wireless but it looks hard to acknowledge the fact that I am contributing something better than nothing..huh!!??!! It is all in a chain linked up which ends up on a nigh..hopefully!! Tracking down all those steps I climbed to get here makes me wonder was I meant to be here or else where :) The centre of life which acts like a compass helps us cycle through all these and then makes us feel satisfied with some part of our journey.

So any soothsayers here?? Do drop down some of those future bits about this world ...for being prepared for all those unpredicted and uncalled emergencies :D Ya you know what I am talking about. I feel sometimes like touching the sky coz thats what I see as my limit. I can bet that once I touch it I would try to push it..So I guess I will no longer stop pushing the limits..buddies let's touch the limits but don't stop there.. keep pushing it coz now our limits are raised higher...and will continue to do so in this game of life

It is beautiful !!!

2007-11-08T04:21:00.000-08:00

It is rightly said that life is beautiful. It is all around you if only you can sense it. I've always been belligerent with my life. It drives me crazy sometimes to compromise coz we do not get what we want in life always. Each time I laugh, I am haunted by the thought that I would be crying one day. Isn't it kiddy??.. yaya I know... But whenever I cry, I never forget to remind myself that I would be laughing one day. This sounds like a bravo!! yaya Thank you :)

The other day I saw a little girl in her school uniform who was holding her mother's hand and walking along the road (probably to the school :P) and she was wearing a frown on her face. There was some fear in her eyes I felt. Very soon we both passed by. Two days later I saw that cute one again and this time she was different. Different in the way she was walking, there was a bliss in her eyes and she was so involved in her talking the walk with her mother. I wanted to be a school girl again :( Ofcourse without all those tests and exams :D

I had a wonderful time at school but surely not the happiest. I had my share of ups and downs at that stage of my life. But there were few who were holding my hand and walking by my side just like the little girl's mother. Thank God for all those amazing people who had made a difference in my life. Small things do make a big difference :) Now I never refrain myself from doing anything even if it seems small coz I know one day or the other it would be a key to a huge door of happiness :) Be happy and make a difference coz life is beautiful and you definitely want to be a part of someone's good books.

Have You Ever??

2007-11-08T04:02:00.000-08:00

Have you ever heard the birds singing??
Have you ever heard the oceans roaring??
Have you ever heard the rivers flowing??
Have you ever heard a mother's song??

Have you ever seen the mountains tremble??
Have you ever seen the flowers swaying??
Have you ever seen the rain drops sprinkle??
Have you ever seen a baby crying??

Have you ever felt pain in your heart??
Have you ever felt peace on your mind??
Have you ever felt faith in your actions??
Have you ever felt the need of your neighbour??

Frozen!!

2007-10-30T23:26:00.000-07:00

"You only see what your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be
You're frozen when your heart's not open

You're so consumed with how much you get
You waste your time with hate and regret
You're broken when your heart's not open"

okay these words are surely not mine :) !!!!

These are the lines from the song Frozen by Madonna. Today while I was walking to the bus stop to board my cab, this kept ringing in my mind. It was actually pouring down from the heavens in fact not like cats and dogs but just minute drops. The cold breeze made me feel so fresh and lovely. While I was singing those lines I was pondering whether I am contended with life or am I expressing contempt. I am yet to make a pick on those. Anyways I resolved not to devastate my present regretting about the past nor worrying about my future. I will live up to the best for this day this minute this second :) I am trying to open my eyes to see more than what I want to see. I want to come out of those comfort zones and stop wanting life to be what I want it to be. I want to see myself as God sees me and so I would see life as God expects me to see. That sounds good. I hope it makes me feel good too. So folks open your eyes and heart to see the beauty and the beast !!! I caution you not to be frozen :D

Life after Bits :D

2007-10-30T00:19:00.000-07:00

It's been 169 days that I've stepped out of BITS :) phew!! quite a long time I feel... Life seems to get more colorful and beautiful as it goes...nonetheless it did take quite a long time for me to absorb all the emotions that came out during these days...

That's how life is..it goes on..neither summer nor winter..neither monsoon nor spring..neither joy nor sorrow nothing can put a halt to our lives except the one and only death!! hoho that did come out powerful...all I can do is sit and complain of my life .."Oh! Look at me...it would've been like that but now it is this.. what can I do??" "Huh!! Why should this always happen to me??" I am not the odd one though... Exciting times do keep spiralling out of my life..n I quickly jump to conclusions that life is incredible..amazing..awesome..so on..but before long I do contradict myself...and keep cribbing...yeah I know again that's how life goes on...

I've seen people whom I could not during the four years of my life in BITS... and I can say a wide variety of people with different abilities and needs.. Of course this world accommodates all types!!! The aberrations were those which caused me some pain and some wonder...I look at myself and ask why am I supposed to see all these things?? what am I supposed to do?? what can I do?? Opportunities drove me to different places... there was so much to look and feel each time I went out...Empowered by what BITS taught me :) I did try to make some difference but you know..it's just like a drop... The indifferent attitudes of people on one hand and the loving concern of people on other hand kept pushing me as though toddling on a rope of life :)

The air around me brings in a motley of feelings and thoughts... Its been a fabulous time ever since I realized that life is always good and we turn bad sometimes...My mind is blocked now !!! ha ha!!.. will let go of the rest of my post very soon :D

Indian Cricket!!! :) :(

2007-10-01T10:47:00.000-07:00

Well India ne chak diya!! The recent T20 world cup title brought life to many of the die hard cricketers and their fans after they were kicked out of the world cup much earlier this year. It has been great to see the aggressive and passionate young blood turning the stones over after their defeat by New Zealand in the T20. Their effort and hard work helped them trample over few of the best nations in the cricketing field. I find no more peace nor calmness in our cricketers....they have all been pumped up with fire and have been reflecting the same in their game. But I think this is not the end but it's just the beginning. The expectations of all the Indian supporters have rouse and they would be expecting a really good fight between the past and the present champions in the present ongoing Future cup.

In view of the reception that the Dhoni boys got when they set their foot on the homeland after owning the very first T20 cup, I guess it was just awesome.. Truly cricket seems to be the favourite son of Mother India but as people of this nation we also need to consider the other sports which have been getting second degree treatment from the people as well as the Government of different states. India takes pride in producing some of the most brilliant sportsmen ever, be it Vishwanath Anand who just earned back his world chess championship title after seven years or the prodigious talented billiards champ Pankaj Advani or Rajyavardhan Rathore the shooting hero or the Football champions or the (national game) Hockey players or many more unlucky chaps.. I can bet that very few know about these men and their achievements..I say they are unlucky coz they get the recognition and praise from other nations who realize the importance of their sport and their performance while neglected and ignored at their home..It is a shame to all of us and the press specially if we are blind to these wonderful men of our land. They definitely deserve more than what they have been receiving or in fact are receiving.

There can be two outcomes of all that is happening. One is that the other sportsmen can get discouraged and their performance could go down lack of support. Two they would continue to fight back with fire and silence the officials with their dazzling performances in the forth coming tournaments. I know that cricket brings in lotsa profits and that BCCI is the richest in the world. This must throw a call for all the other associations to fasten their belts and get things going. They need to render support no matter what and see that their cream gets the best support and encouragement.

Coming to our "dear sport" cricket I wish that they continue winning laurels for India..else the same pomp and the enthusiasm of the fans here would become history and they would no longer continue to grab the attention of theirs. May they fight fire with fire not only in words but also in actions to prove that we can be consistent winning champions.

And let us all patronize all the other sports heroes of the nation who have been getting step motherly treatment, with much fairness and unbiased love just to lift up our country to higher grounds in the world of sports!!

Is this world no more a safe place?

2007-09-10T01:37:00.000-07:00

This is in the context of the recent mishaps that occurred all over the world and in specific our country India and pin pointedly Hyderabad. I still remember my first day in Hyderabad. Early in the morning it was so quiet and serene. The blue sky with the green patches around and the skyscrapers. It was in amazement that I looked at the nature and man's creativity. Imagine then how creative is our creator??

Very soon I realized that it was all an illusion. As the sun took over the place, I could hear so much of noise around, with people and vehicles in a race to reach their terminals. Very soon the roads started to crowd and the commercial streets started their rock. Amidst all this I could still see a few happy faces around which brought smiles over my face. But in the recent past it was more of a troubled and chaotic city that has instilled fears in almost every resident right from a young lad to an old lady. Where to we run from and where to we run to? What is the cause and who is to be blamed? What is happening and why is it so?? I am sure at least one of these questions would be ringing in the minds of all the Hyderabadis. The city being in the limelight is manifested in the attraction that it has provided for terror attacks.

Death is inevitable, none of us can deny that fact but the uncertainty that lies beneath has now been brought to the surface and proven over and over again. When I heard of the the terror attacks that occurred in the US and other parts of the world, I was a bit worried. Later when Tsunamis struck and claimed the lives of so many innocent people I was shaken away. But when things happened so close or rather when I just could be saved from a horrible incident by a fraction of time or distance i was totally troubled. My mind is refusing to be calm or think right. It is the worst things that could happen which strike my mind and it keeps running all over the place. The importance and the preciousness of life is what I keep hovering about.

Now I come to the junction and ask myself is this world no more a safe place? I guess we all need to heed to something greater to depend on and rely upon. It is high time we realize the need of something more powerful and saving. My only wish is that all the big heads of this country would deal with all these sensitive issues and security threats in a wise manner. Inspite of these happenings people are still in their wild dreams some chasing after power , wealth, name and place in the society. United, can we fight for any cause. So selflessness should render its aid in filling all those loop holes and making our nation a safe place to live and let live!!

Road of Life ==>>

2007-08-29T00:00:00.000-07:00

I see myself as a road newly laid, perfectly finished
Smooth and slippery, I just can't take my eyes of it
Enjoying a ride on it, each one is exceptional
Marks have they left behind, which shaped me

This is the road of life, this is the road of life
I can't see the terminus, I want to know the destiny!

The footsteps of a mollycoddled infant, the touch
There is nothing like that, bringing me back to life
Stumbled down, its tender fingers reach the floor
They stir the waters of my world, quenching my thirst

This is the road of life, this is the road of life
I can't see the terminus, I want to know the destiny!

Blooming flowers, swaying around and playing along
The leaves flying with the cool breeze shadow me
And when it is time they come down to greet me
With eagerness and zeal to cover me, grilling all day

This is the road of life, this is the road of life
I can't see the terminus, I want to know the destiny!

Clouds are my best friends, they give me solace
Soothing me, scorching and singeing in the sun
Oh! How I yearn to just have a glimpse of them
The drops it sprinkles on me quenches my flames

This is the road of life, this is the road of life
I can't see the terminus, I want to know the destiny!

Then come the gigantic which hurt and scathe me
I am now covered with pot holes and I need a filling
I can't get back to the same splendour and grandeur
How can this be? Is there no way out of this grief?

This is the road of life, this is the road of life
I can't see the terminus, I want to know the destiny!

Later arrived the replete, satiating and filling me all
It demanded pain to settle down and reform me
I was cut out and made but the beauty lies within
I was given a new birth, a road to lead on and lead

This is the road of life, this is the road of life
I can't see the terminus, I want to know the destiny!

My heart!

2007-08-28T23:36:00.000-07:00

When life seems so uncertain
When things around scare me
When nothing goes my way
When everything seems upside down
When I feel like screaming out loud
When I want to cry out my heart
When I start to hate things I love most
When friends look like strangers

Then your love fills my cup
Lord, your grace covers me
The void in my heart overflows with joy
I am silenced by your lovingkindness

I don't have to speak out
Tears of happiness roll down
Calming down all my anxieties

Hard to be Faithful!

2007-08-28T23:33:00.001-07:00

Lost in this world of chaos
Struggling to reach the shore
I had to find my way out of this maze
I tried hard to break those chains
That held me all my life

Then did faith give me new birth
Everything looked so beautiful
I smelt the freshness of life
I saw much more than I could
I felt like a float, buoyancy provided!

I loved the way it was going
Before long did I realize, that wasn’t all
Oh! Life is also full of tribulations
I knew I had to live it, worthy of living
I conked out, yet hope never left me

Many a times have I been through
The happy and sad phases of life
Success for me was to move on
From one failure to the other one
With exuberance and desire in my heart

After all this I can simply say
Yes, it is hard to be faithful
Never can I stop marveling
At the faithfulness of my God!

Is this Love?

2007-08-28T23:28:00.000-07:00

I'm in a trance
I know not what is happening
It's a struggle within me
My thoughts and my feelings
It's a long way to travel
From my mind to my heart
I can do nothing but wait

This journey brings me through
Incredible feelings and irresistible thoughts
What do I do?
I wish the earth stops spinning
Let my life stop here
I want love.Where is love?
I want to flee from hurt, save me!

I lie on my bed, my eyes closed
My heart and mind wide opened
Does love make me restless?
Tossing over and brooding over
Time goes on,days pass by
I stand here, I lie here
With my eyes and arms waiting

Take my love and give me love
Capture my heart, captivate me
Leave me not, I fear fall
May love rise me up, I wish it did
I am deafened to my heart now
Learning to live with pain
I am dead, but still living

I wonder why? I wonder how?
Is this love? Is this love?

Choice

2007-08-28T23:25:00.000-07:00

Looking out through the window I see the old lady walking by
Her stomach shrinking, her heart sinking and face drowning
Each day she always longed for someone who would lighten up
The day she would remember for her fastened and strangled life

Untimely out of its mother's womb, I can hear the baby crying
Where am I? Why am I here? I am yet to take form to face
This life filled with incertitude and sempiternal misery
Can you hear me? I cry waiting to be pulled out from this well!

I know this little lad who comes back home with questions
Dragging his miniature mind and leaves it locked up in a dock
Who has the key? When do I find it? When would I be set free?
He calls out in vociferation, but I know none can hear him

How could one be so bonny without a blemish and flaw?
The beauty queen was surrounded by these words all her life
An unfortunate happening left her burnt, she slumped and lost hope
Everyone now is scared to look at her once spotless immaculate face

I see the sun rise each day and set at dusk, but it never would be
The same for one who has been through the depths of suffering
Unrequited they are all around me, what can I do to better their life
My choice would be a turning point for a desperate soul out there!

From Darkness into Light

2007-08-28T23:20:00.000-07:00

There are many roads that I come across,
Oh! Where is each road destined to ?
How I hoped there was someone
Who could lead me to the truth.
Everyone around made spurious remarks,
In a mix up, I was unaware of my next move.

Following my conscious, I landed nowhere
Never feeling the need to look up for help
Though there was One always beside
Blinded was I by my pride and arrogance
Never did I realize that the light within me
Was darkness which misdirected me

Jesus you were there to allay me
Sorry! I didn’t have the eyes to see you
Sorry! I didn’t have the heart to feel you
Open arms were waiting patiently for me
To carry all my botherations, with gratis
Onto your saving side assuring peace

Pardon me for I am full of filth
I can't see your face, shining like gold
Deliver me from the darkness of my world
Leave me not, lest I fall into the pit of death
And get trapped in the trauma of life
There is nothing else I could pursue

Make me yours daddy, appease me
What a joy it is to be given new life?
A second chance to be your child
I don't have to wallow in my sorrows
Cause now I know the way that elevates
To higher grounds, that would take me home.